Caught Short

Description

ZACHARY grew up being bullied for being short, like when schoolmate GRANT stole his shoe and dangled it over his head just out of reach. But he shows them all when, as a twelve-year-old, he uses his confirmation money to buy out the tuck shop and then doubles the prices. With no one allowed to leave the school grounds, where else would all those hungry boys get their sugar fix? Fast forward 25 years and he’s still coming out on top while working in a record shop. When teenagers JUSTINE and FIDELMA arrive in search of tickets to see popstar JOSHUA, he tells them they’re sold out but he happens to have a couple of tickets he bought for himself he can’t use anymore which they can have for double the price. They storm off after mocking his short stature and knocking over a cardboard cutout of Joshua. Suited and booted, Zachary does a brisk trade outside the big gig scalping tickets. Finding himself in desperate need of a pee, Zachary cons the paparrazi into leaving the side door clear by telling them Joshua is at the Grand Central Hotel and sneaks inside as a roadie comes out for a smoke. Inside the venue, where nobody challenges a guy wearing a suit, he goes in search of a loo and finds himself backstage where Joshua and his band are doing a sound check. Zachary suddenly realises what all this fuss is about – this guy has presence! He climbs up a ladder to a gangway to get a better view just as Joshua gets a message that the paparrazi are staked out at his hotel. The band look around for the promoter and assume it’s Zachary. Zachary goes along with it and brings Joshua back to his flat to hide out from the paparazzi. Joshua opens up about how his fame has made him reflect on what’s important in life and reveals that he’s given away most of his money so he can look himself in the mirror. Zachary catches his own reflection in the mirror… When it’s Joshua’s turn to use the loo, he’s bemused to find the cardboard cut-out – is Zachary a superfan? Joshua confronts his host but Zachary is saved by the bell. He finds Justice and Fidelma on his doorstep – they spotted him driving away from the venue and tracked him down in desperation since they still have no tickets for the gig. They’re annoyed with him and call him ‘Napoleon’ but when Zachary points out to them it’s not fun going through life being teased for being vertically-challenged they’re suitable chastened and apologise. Zachary gives them free tickets and the cardboard cut-out, now signed by Joshua. When the star appears at the door to greet his devoted fans, the girls faint and Zachary and Joshua catch one each. Joshua remarks that Zachary is stronger than he looks, prompting Zachary to ask Joshua for a job as his roadie.

Biblical Connection

The inspiration for Caught Short is Luke 19, verses one to ten – the story of Zacchaeus the wealthy tax collector, who climbed a tree to see Jesus when he couldn’t see over the crowd. When Jesus asked him to come down and said he would stay at his house, Zacchaeus offered to give half his possessions to the poor and make restitution to those he’d cheated. In my story, Zachary reinvents himself as ‘Zach Chaos’ when he gets one over on his schoolmates and maintains the same persona as an adult, but he’s inspired by charismatic popstar Joshua to make amends and follow him instead of being a ticket tout. I was drawn to this particular Bible story because Zacchaeus was an outsider, a despised tax collector, and I wondered how being short of stature may have influenced his choice of career. I have given my protagonist a morally dubious (though not illegal) role but want the audience to empathise with him enough to understand why he might have made that life choice and be ready to forgive him for it once he sees the error of his ways. The teenage girls represent the disapproving crowd who witness his salvation.